Holy Lao

Location:
Laos

Misdirected Monk Offering

By Laura Menge

Holy Lao! Or, How to Lose Karma (and $18) Before 7 a.m.

One of the most beautiful and interesting things about Luang Prabang, Laos is the orange-robed Buddhist monks who file down the tiny streets collecting alms every morning as the sun comes up. The Lao love their monks and faithfully rise early to meet them with gifts of food (usually sticky rice and bananas.) The food collected is the only food the monks receive, as their practice prohibits income. I couldn't wait to see this famous morning processional for myself.

My alarm went off a little late on my first day in Luang Prabang, so with no time to spare I jumped out of bed, grabbed my camera, and ran outside in the T-shirt and shorts I had slept in to find the men in orange. At the corner I met three lovely Lao women carrying bananas and rice - one long stick across the right shoulder, heavy baskets of food balanced on both sides - who told me to come with them. I followed gratefully to an intersection where they sat down and made a little camp of blankets and food. "Sit down with us!" they gestured, and I was happy to oblige. I squealed with delight when I saw the monks come down the street, in silent single file, spanning ages 6 to 60 and all with shaved heads and brightly colored robes. They opened their black pots when they passed the food donors, nodding at gifts in quiet appreciation. "You can feed the monks with our food!" the women signed. I indicated that I didn't have any money on me to offer them, but they wanted me to join them anyway. What gracious Buddhist ladies!

Kneeling on a mat in my thin, cotton clothing, unwashed but terribly excited, I broke the bananas, scooped up the rice with my hands, and added them generously to the black pots.

"Good morning Monk! This is for you!"

"Love the robe!"

"Oh isn't this fun!"

"Yay Buddhism!" I sang to each, waving the food merrily. I paused in my glorious food passing only to snap three dozen photos of the monks up close. Some of the monks didn't open their pot for me but walked away quickly, I guessed they already had enough.

After the last monk passed, I thanked the kind women and started on my way home. But suddenly there was a problem. They followed me all the way to the hotel, yapping. So they do want money after all I sighed, and motioned that I would bring some from my room. I brought out my wallet and offered a generous 20,000 kip ($2, approximately what I'd spend on dinner) but they gasped at the pittance. Suddenly one said in crisp English, "Six American dollars, each." I had been suckered into giving $18 (three nights' rent in the hotel) to these little harpies. Oh well, I told myself as I forked over the cash, it's good karma after all. I fed the poor, hungry monks!

Later in the day, on a self-guided tour around town, I saw a sign posted on a main building that described the tradition of sunrise collection and how to participate (and not participate). It stated plainly:

1. Do NOT speak to the monks, remain absolutely quiet with head bowed

2. Do NOT take their photos

3. Women giving food must be respectfully dressed in clean long sleeves and long pants or skirt

4. Above all, do not buy monks' food from "morning vendors." These are not faithful Buddhists but shameless profiteers. Their food is dirty and unholy.

Not only had my morning charity not bought me any extra karma, but it has officially demoted me to the fourth ring of Buddhist Hell. Forget about nirvana, I will now need to be reincarnated at least 8 more times as a guppy.

Further Information

Must see/do at this place: Rent a bicycle for $1 a day and simply pedal around town, enjoying the old French colonial achitecture against the backdrop of the Mekong. Also eat!! The food is the best I've ever tastes.

You should avoid here: Feeding the monks!!